Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Such big little Cupcakes!!!!!

This was one of those days that our little Twinkies let us know they are growing up! Like Miriam our nanny said, it is so wonderful and so sad at the same time.


So Miriam and I cleaned out the play room. We got rid of 2/3 of the toys in that room! All the ride on toys, the activity tables, rattles, etc. are gone. We have already given away a ton of stuff and now there is even more.


So we also got rid of the high chairs. Now they sit in boosters like big kids at the table as of today. It was overdue! It is was one of those things that we just didn't get around to doing. Now we can have dinner all together as a family :) It is so wonderful.


Don't laugh and don't judge. We also got them child safety harnesses. Today was their first day and again they loved it. It is my hope that if they get used to them I can start leaving the house with both kids by myself. Having a disability made it dangerous to go to a store or walk to the park b/c if one ran off I couldn't catch catch him/her. I don't think I'm going to dare with all 3 though for a while.


So our final cupcake brag would just be a cute video of them singing "White Christmas". Cally started and Rachel finally joined in :)


We have some cute neat stuff going on with Harmon too. Maybe that will be our next post!

Monday, November 28, 2011

The Battle Over a Crock Pot and other Black Friday purchases...

Despite being insanely feverish I still did Black Friday on Friday morning, but I wasn't too dramatic. As always I did the "Francisca, I'm a lazy person Black Friday" which meant I woke up at my normal time, threw on some sweats and hit a couple of stores. The nice thing is that I live in a horridly small town and all the BF obsessed people have come and gone but the good stuff is still in stock. Since it is before 11 the Early Bird specials are still on as well. I miss the doorbusters but lets face it I wouldn't have a chance anyway. I worry if I tried to compete for doorbusters than I would end up on ABC News getting crushed by an angry lady with a handgun and pepper spray. This year being sick I just passed my shopping list to the sales people who asked me what I was looking for and I was in and out. Everyone was kind. It was pleasant.

Chris is on my case though for the "deals" I bought. He can handle the few extra toys I added to the pile at the last minute since we are purging old ones. He can't deal with why I would ever buy a blender (since I've not ever blended something in the 5 yrs we have been together), Belgium Waffle Iron, a new griddle (when I have an old slightly broken one, and a Crock Pot when I still have one. I explained I got them for 10 dollars (post rebate) and they are all super top of the line! He argued the same old tired excuse: BUT YOU DON'T COOK!!!!!!! Details, details... If he keeps it up with that attitude I'm never going to start!

So I was ready to return my $10 treasures but Miriam saw it and was like "no way" this is great stuff. She did justify that I do make waffles for the kids occasionally when I have mom guilt, and on the weekends we make pancakes for the griddle. We need the blender b/c you never when you might need to blend something, after all there is always a first for everything.

Than there is the Crock Pot. I actually do Crock beans... that is about it. But this one is new and shiny and programable. For a working mom I think that the odds of me ever putting something together for dinner on a consistent basis will one day require a nice Crock Pot and this will come in handy. If not for a working dad like Chris who will probably get frustrated my lack of cooking eventually a nice shiny Crock Pot like this will come in handy for him... RIGHT???

Than again you never know who will show up to help you cook!

I know this was a random add on to the post but I love Gordon Ramsey and I find this commercial hilarious!

Sunday, November 27, 2011

The thankless truth...

I've had an attitude of gratitude on my mind this whole past week. I think tonight I realized something though!

Harmon just traipsed into my room. He was crying b/c he couldn't find something, he won't go to sleep, Daddy is mean, etc. and so I let him sit next to me. Poor Chris has had it up to here with that boy. I know that look of total utter frustration. Being real sick and him having to hold down the fort this past week. Those kids are driving him batty.


I think he is going to be giddy going back to work tomorrow. When you work outside the home and you do a good job you normally feel good about it! You get positive feedback, have friends at work, earn money, etc. Being at home is difficult. Kids don't express appreciation like adults do. You love them though and you want to give them the world, but it is hard.


I don't think either of us knew what our parent's gave up and sacrificed for us until we became parents. Chris made me laugh b/c he texted his mom on Thanksgiving something to the effect of: "Mom now I understand how difficult it is to put together a whole Thanksgiving and than clean up afterwards... Sorry I didn't help more and thanks for everything!" I think about my mom who stayed at home for about 18 yrs just raising kids... I don't know how she did it! That chick must have had angels on her shoulders helping her.


So besides not appreciating my parents I also don't think I always appreciate my husband. Heaven knows he doesn't always appreciate me ;) Chris did so much this extended weekend to help me get better. Just slowing down and watching him in action made me glad for everything is his doing. We have had rough spots recently but we have really overcome a lot of it. I think if we can express our appreciation more it will make things all the better. So Chris, thank you for everything you gave the kids and me this weekend and always!

So I guess all this gratitude thinking has me realizing... I need to be letting people know more all the wonderful things people do for me. But moreover I need to let those closest people know that I appreciate them.

A quick note about me...


If you follow this blog I'm sure if I mention "hey I'm sick again"... the response is going to be "WHAT???" Why is she always sick? I don't talk about it much on the blog or in real life. This condition but it doesn't define me. Nevertheless the challenges do affect my life.


I have RA and the only way to treat it is by suppressing the immune system. As it has progressed significantly this past two years the medications are more serious. With that comes new consequences. One of which is that my body is unable to fight off anything these days. If the kids get sick, I will likely get sick. This has almost landed me in the hospital at one point in the past year. I'm hoping if I continue to eat healthy, stay active, and keep a good attitude my body might be able to fight these things off better. Currently I have a serious chest infection and what looks to be endometriosis. It isn't fun, but it will pass; these things always do. In the mean time I'm trying to focus on all of the positive I've got going on and not worrying about that which I can't change.


Thursday, November 24, 2011

Thanksgiving Thanks!



My husband asked if I had a nice Thanksgiving... The answer was a resounding yes. It was just so peaceful. I don't remember a holiday lacking any sort of contention or worry. I'm sick again... what else is new. Knowing this, and knowing I'm just not the big meal cooking type Chris took over EVERYTHING. He did the most amazing job cooking it all: stuffing, sweet potato pie, full turkey, mashed potatoes, etc. I was amazed. He did such a great job. I think he should take over every year :)


My parents came. It was lovely to see them. I would lie if I didn't admit that it is hard for Chris and I not to see our extended family (and I know they missed us) but it is worth it not to feel so torn trying to please everyone.


Afterward we took the kids to go see the Smurfs at the dollar theatre. Thank Heaven's there were no other people in the movie b/c those kids acted like wild turkeys. I don't think we will be doing the regular movies anytime soon again. Nevertheless everything was so nice. I've got a lot to be grateful for!

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

So many people to be thankful for!


Today was just a really hard day for me. I overdid it last night and than I had invited fellow mom friends who were not traveling today to come over and make Advent Calendars. I also had a transition meeting with Rachel's Service Coordinator Jorge who comes over weekly to work with her on developmental milestones.


So rather than feeling just overwhelmed on a day off I just had a good time. Nothing was ready when my mom friends came over. We all had a great time though and no one minded. our nanny Miriam and I have grown to love these ladies. Than I went and grabbed pizza, this way Miriam and Jorge could just chill while we all discussed Rachel's transition in August.


Chris got home a little after one so we let Miriam off early (she doesn't do holidays but she loves paid time off like all of us). I realized that even though I was tired I had my beautiful babies, a sweet husband, and just so many wonderful people surrounding us. When Rachel and Callum do transition I'm going to miss all our early intervention friends that we have made. I love our mom friends!!! I hope we remain close for years to come :) Than there is Miriam. She is like a sister to me. I'm so grateful everyday she has stayed with our family for so long. The love she gives my children is beyond diamonds and I've grown to just love her. When she does move on (b/c she is too overqualified for us) it will break my heart. She is just the best! I know it will be a lifelong friendship though when it is time ::heart::

So this Thanksgiving I'm going to be counting my blessings; but today I got an early start just by looking around and seeing the amazing beautiful people who filled our home this morning.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Dressing Up and Speaking Up...


Anyone who knows Chris and I knows we love jeans, t-shirts, and chilling at a little hole-in-the-wall restaurant! To us that is romance. Tonight though we ended up at a formal dinner where the Governor was again the keynote speaker. I was very proud of Chris. He is gets shy talking to people at these sorts of things but he talked to everyone and we had a really good time.

I also got out of my own comfort zone tonight. Last time we did this I did meet the Governor but I never really spoke with her. Tonight when it was over there were not many people left so I went and said hi. I thanked her for her support of small business and we talked about growing up in El Paso. Where I am proud of myself though is that I also mentioned what was going on with our school district exiting special ed kids en masse. We talked Harmon and Rachel a little and she shared with me some of her experiences. She told me that some of the things the school had been telling me about funding were not really true and that her office will be looking into why so many students are being exited so quickly. I doubt anything will come of this but if just by chance something good does come of it that would be neat.


With all of that though I guess when it comes down to it I just loved being with my husband. It was fun and romantic. We need to hang out with adults more often!

PS: Thanks to all the ladies who helped dress me. You know who you are ;)

Monday, November 21, 2011

The latest in RIDICULOUS Barbie dolls!

I needed to go to Kohls looking for new shoes and so we took the kids to play in the toy section. This is where I saw the following ridiculousness:


Yes, in Barbieville, the cops wear micro-mini skirts! My inner-feminist just cries when I see things like this :(

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Turkey War Resolutions and New Traditions...

Well the other day I wrote about being frustrated with Thanksgiving. I just feel that we are getting sort of stuck between Chris' and my families history of traditions. It has been hard for us creating our own family traditions. At church it sort of hit Chris though that it was important to start creating those traditions.

So that means no AZ for a Cakes family reunion and no El Paso even for a homestyle Abuelita Thanksgiving (Heaven help me I still haven't told my mom). It is hard on both our sides. We don't want to hurt our respective families. Still if we don't set boundaries now we will be holiday ping pong fodder for generations to come. Holidays will be in our home, this year and the rest of the years... until one day our married kids tell us "mom, we do Thanksgiving at our house."


The plan is simple. I'll make Bobby Flay's turkey, Paula Deen's stuffing (I gotta incorporate some of those Southern faves of Chris' into the meal), his mom's green bean casserole (the one on the French's cans), and my mom's sweet potato pie recipe. It will be a touch of old in a new family. Anyone and everyone will always be invited :) Afterward in honor of one of Chris' beloved traditions we will take the critters to the movies. After all if we eat at noon we have to do something to entertain ourselves. This of course means I probably won't do Black Friday b/c my health has been shaky but I'm giving up something good for something better!

Saturday, November 19, 2011

Good, Better, Best: Choosing the Better Part!

Today Chris and I took some time away from the kids and discussed some important things. Bonus and pay raises are around the corner and so this is just the best time to make a plan for the next year. That meant looking at next years budget, traveling in the next year, work, the transition from Miriam to pre-school that will be occurring next fall, and if I would keep taking classes to bring me closer to my personal goal of furthering my education. We also discussed my needing surgery possibly during the holidays.

I think I wanted to just CRY!!!! It is overwhelming thinking about all the different things going on. I think that is when I remembered a talk I once read.


The speaker said the following: "We have to forego some good things in order to choose others that are better or best... We should begin by recognizing the reality that just because something is good is not a sufficient reason for doing it. The number of good things we can do far exceeds the time available to accomplish them. Some things are better than good, and these are the things that should command priority attention in our lives... There is no easy formula for that contest of priorities. However, I have never known of a man who looked back on his working life and said, “I just didn’t spend enough time with my job.” (Source)

It is pretty obvious what the best thing we have in our life is: our marriage and our children. So the trick is for Chris and I will always be is to balance the other needs and goals so they reflect those values. I'm still overwhelmed but remembering this basic truth is very comforting.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Ho Hum on Santa!


If you are my mom, please don't read this post!!!!!

If since I could remember I never believed that Santa was for sure real. I always had serious doubts from day one. I would find the gifts my parents had hidden and see them marked for Santa. I would see Walmart tags on gifts that Elves supposedly had made. My older siblings would let it slip that it was sort of a myth. I think as a small child I figured he existed somewhere but never visited my home. I believed in the spirit (and I still do in a strange way) but I never looked at him as some physical real being. It was peaceful for me knowing. I never had false expectations.

Well now if you ask anyone I'm EVIL! I'm a grinch!!! Who doesn't believe in Santa? You see this is the year I'm supposed to start teaching the kids about Santa. But I don't know if I want to perpetuate the idea of him visiting our home and tagging gifts. I would rather teach that Santa is more like The Little Mermaid. He is out there somewhere doing good and we need to help him by helping others

Chris thinks I'm horrible (even though as a child he thought Santa HATED him b/c Santa got his rich friends better gifts than he ever got). Robbing them of childhood innocence. I suppose if he really is persistent on it I will cave and let the kids bake cookies and threaten them when they are bad that Santa is watching. I'm hoping though he will back down a little, but if he doesn't I will relent. The spirit of Christmas shouldn't be contention after all.


I just think it is funny that one can feel this way and everyone think I'm crazy. Maybe I am. After all this is what happens when you are the youngest of a blended family and your earliest Christmas memories were of watching Gremlins!!!! (I'm still scared of those things... I think it is really the only thing that can still creep me out but I was like 4 when I saw it for the first time).

Monday, November 14, 2011

The GREAT Turkey War!

I've had to fight really hard to convince my family and Chris that holidays for children should be in their home. This is something I grew up with and I feel it is important. We always had the most special events in our home growing up. This included opening gifts on Christmas morning and Thanksgiving dinner.


Unfortunately if you ask the grandparents (Chris' side) or the Abuelitos (my side) those traditions should be done in their home or worse we should have to drive cross country with Great-Grandparents. So for the last 5 years of our marriage we have been playing tug of war and compromising. The final compromise was that we celebrate the main parts in our home and than (assuming they are in town) we will take a little time and visit each of the families. In the mean time if either side wants to attend the main event in our home they are welcome to attend.



So what is the problem? Well even though Chris and I agree the families still want it their way. Chris' family is traveling to Phoenix (even though they all live here to go have a reunion) and so there is the pressure there (and it is a full court press). Than there is the fact that Chris really loves my mom's food. For an Abuelita born in Puerto Rico the chick can cook a bird and do the good old fashioned southern fixings. Chris goes crazy for it!!!! So now there is pressure for me not to even really cook and just go over there to eat. After all... I've been having some complications with my condition and he doesn't want me to overdo it (like I'm buying that one).


Alas this is a pain in the neck. I can either insist on cooking for Thanksgiving (you would think my spouse would be excited with the idea of his wife actually cooking) and force everyone in my family (including my siblings and parents) to endure two full meals on Thanksgiving. Or cave and do Tamales or turkey sandwiches. Chris promises it is only for this year because he really is worried about my health. Nevertheless I worry that all these years of me fighting for Holiday respect is out the window b/c my mom is the Latina Paula Deen. I'll probably give in but heck no is she beating me out on Christmas!!!!

Sunday, November 13, 2011

That bratty little sister!

So I took a blog vacation! It had to be done. In one week I've been sick (got a chest cold), fighting the school district to keep Harm's services, and dealing 9,000 other things for work and school!


So I didn't know what to write about until I was thinking about my baby girl. She is a lot like me! The boys are just the best of friends. They each have their own trains and they love playing together. I think Rach gets jealous b/c she goes in there and steals a handful of trains and runs away. Not b/c she likes trains (she doesn't) but rather to get their goat. She also does other things like hide their loveys and do other things to get their goat.

I don't blame her. I think she feels left out honestly but for peace sake she can't do it and not face consequences. Times like this I wish she could have a little sister, but that means I would have to have another child... that just ain't worth! So instead I'm just going to hang in there and try give her extra love so maybe she won't torture her brothers so much.

Monday, November 7, 2011

Monkey's Blood, Fortune Telling, and the other weird things my parents did to me!

Today I was reading poetry and came across a great one. It is called, "Puerto Rican Obituary" by Pedro Pietri. It made me think of culture and upbringing. No matter where I go I get teased a lot but I also get a lot of inquiries about how a "normal person" like me can believe in such things as ghosts or have been a fortune teller. I don't know what to say. It is how I was raised. Chris teases me mercilessly that I was definitely not raised like a normal person! It is true I wasn't. This is why I started laughing when I read this poem for the following lines.

Is time
to visit sister lopez again
the number one healer
and fortune card dealer
in Spanish Harlem
She can communicate
with your late relatives
for a reasonable fee
Good news is guaranteed

That is how I was raised. It was so different. We were taught ghosts, angels, and aliens were totally normal. I was taken to psychic fairs on the weekend growing up and taught to read cards and stuff... don't all kids?


When my friends would cut themselves their mother's put Neosporin on their wounds. My mother though still spits at that stuff claiming it is a conspiracy to cause infection and make you go to the hospital. We had to have Mecuro (it is called Monkeys Blood and died our skin red for weeks) and we were not allowed bandaids b/c they cause infection too.



When we got sick we were not taken to the doctor or given medicine right away. Instead my mother would go find a tea for that. Sometimes she grew the herbs in the front yard but our pet ducks would eat it (another interesting thing was living in the city and having rabbits, ducks and chickens as pets). I still to this day can't go near an herbal tea! They were nasty. What was wrong with Pepto Bismal.


Other funny things were: I was never allowed to cut my hair. My mom's family and our family speak so loudly (and it is often interspersed with curse words, something I'm trying hard to drop for my own kids sake); we are not mad at each other but rather just very animated. We say what is on our mind. I would get dumped and my mom would say "get over it, he was a loser, now go do you homework).

My family!

It isn't all bad though. This is why we love big parties and we love food! I was raised where "family is family, and you will have each other" so even now my siblings and I fiercely protect each other. We also laugh and laugh. That was part of why Chris fell in love with me. There is a feeling of welcoming everyone and serving. It makes me want to always be helping others now as an adult. Honesty was always a cornerstone in my home growing up. My parents made it clear money doesn't matter as much as being a good person matters!



Sometimes I wonder how my culture will melt with Chris' (which is a more "All American" style). I think we will skip the psychic fairs and card readings but definitely keep the huge parties! I wonder if my kids will one day be writing blogs about the horrid things their mom did. I think that is a given. I wonder what they will take as adults. I guess I just hope they will have a strong faith in God, a heart filled with love, and still love to laugh. They also better still love the Texas Longhorns ;)



Sunday, November 6, 2011

Time changes are NOT FUN!

I hate you Benjamin Franklin!

I used to love Fall Back when I was a little. It meant we could actually make McDonald's breakfast for once when I was little. In college it meant an extra hour of sleep. After college it meant I could stay out later the night before and still make it to church. Alas those days are over!


Now I have kids and Daylight's Saving Time doesn't work! The kids didn't get the memo. So Chris kept them up late last night. They still woke up when they usually do, so the whole day they have been cranky monsters. On Facebook some of my friends bragged about their kids doing great... THAT WAS NOT MY FAMILY. Ugh, I wish we lived in Russia, they don't have DST over there!!!

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

It is beginning to look a lot like Christmas!


I'm a horrible person. Today I was shopping with the kids and Chris. I was in a crummy mood (still catching up on work after too much Halloween and very moody little kids). Anyhow as I started sifting through the Halloween Clearance section the store was blasting Christmas Carols. Suddenly I stopped being sullen and started humming. Cally our resident musician quickly got into it as well. Chris and I are dancing in the aisles.


Christopher is horrified. He thinks I am disrespecting the bird. I'm not, but the bird ain't anything compared to my good friends Rudolph and Frosty. So we are at odds. Thanksgiving is his favorite holiday (he loves to eat). So I guess I will have to wait till Black Friday to put up the decorations...


But I'm excited! See my side ticker!!!! Also Callum is excited too. He threw this cd into the cart and Daddy didn't catch... perhaps I will have to put the carols on early.

Daisypath Christmas tickers

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Halloweenitis...


Our family is suffering from a serious condition: TOO MUCH HALLOWEEN! We came, we saw, and we trick or treated!


Rachel got sick from all the candy at one of our 3 scheduled parties on Friday. Cally almost got eaten by a lion. Both Chris and I are horribly behind on work. Harmon though was the saddest tale. Last night we did our Tricks or Treats and one guy had a scary garage and scared him. He was so scared last night he wouldn't go to bed and after he finally did he couldn't sleep. He woke up about 4 times and kept sneaking into our bed. When Daddy would go to move him back to his room he would say, "Leave me alone Daddy, I'm not doing anything!" I felt so bad for him. We will be more careful where we go next year.


So does this mean we are scaling back? Nah! It was a great year. I've learned to control the candy consumption and will be more careful where we trick or treat. Otherwise I wouldn't change a thing. We had 2 great parties, celebrated with so many great friends, had some special moments with our kids at the various activities, and just had a great time.


The only thing that I still wonder though is: who took our Halloween candy??? We never had a trick or treater I noticed the full bucket when we got home at 9:30 (it is a gated community) but this morning when Miriam got to work the bucket we had left outside was mysteriously empty... I'm glad! They took all our crummy candy we had amassed that past few months from pinatas and other special events. Now we can sit back and enjoy the kids good chocolate!!!!

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Such big little Cupcakes!!!!!

This was one of those days that our little Twinkies let us know they are growing up! Like Miriam our nanny said, it is so wonderful and so sad at the same time.


So Miriam and I cleaned out the play room. We got rid of 2/3 of the toys in that room! All the ride on toys, the activity tables, rattles, etc. are gone. We have already given away a ton of stuff and now there is even more.


So we also got rid of the high chairs. Now they sit in boosters like big kids at the table as of today. It was overdue! It is was one of those things that we just didn't get around to doing. Now we can have dinner all together as a family :) It is so wonderful.


Don't laugh and don't judge. We also got them child safety harnesses. Today was their first day and again they loved it. It is my hope that if they get used to them I can start leaving the house with both kids by myself. Having a disability made it dangerous to go to a store or walk to the park b/c if one ran off I couldn't catch catch him/her. I don't think I'm going to dare with all 3 though for a while.


So our final cupcake brag would just be a cute video of them singing "White Christmas". Cally started and Rachel finally joined in :)


We have some cute neat stuff going on with Harmon too. Maybe that will be our next post!

Monday, November 28, 2011

The Battle Over a Crock Pot and other Black Friday purchases...

Despite being insanely feverish I still did Black Friday on Friday morning, but I wasn't too dramatic. As always I did the "Francisca, I'm a lazy person Black Friday" which meant I woke up at my normal time, threw on some sweats and hit a couple of stores. The nice thing is that I live in a horridly small town and all the BF obsessed people have come and gone but the good stuff is still in stock. Since it is before 11 the Early Bird specials are still on as well. I miss the doorbusters but lets face it I wouldn't have a chance anyway. I worry if I tried to compete for doorbusters than I would end up on ABC News getting crushed by an angry lady with a handgun and pepper spray. This year being sick I just passed my shopping list to the sales people who asked me what I was looking for and I was in and out. Everyone was kind. It was pleasant.

Chris is on my case though for the "deals" I bought. He can handle the few extra toys I added to the pile at the last minute since we are purging old ones. He can't deal with why I would ever buy a blender (since I've not ever blended something in the 5 yrs we have been together), Belgium Waffle Iron, a new griddle (when I have an old slightly broken one, and a Crock Pot when I still have one. I explained I got them for 10 dollars (post rebate) and they are all super top of the line! He argued the same old tired excuse: BUT YOU DON'T COOK!!!!!!! Details, details... If he keeps it up with that attitude I'm never going to start!

So I was ready to return my $10 treasures but Miriam saw it and was like "no way" this is great stuff. She did justify that I do make waffles for the kids occasionally when I have mom guilt, and on the weekends we make pancakes for the griddle. We need the blender b/c you never when you might need to blend something, after all there is always a first for everything.

Than there is the Crock Pot. I actually do Crock beans... that is about it. But this one is new and shiny and programable. For a working mom I think that the odds of me ever putting something together for dinner on a consistent basis will one day require a nice Crock Pot and this will come in handy. If not for a working dad like Chris who will probably get frustrated my lack of cooking eventually a nice shiny Crock Pot like this will come in handy for him... RIGHT???

Than again you never know who will show up to help you cook!

I know this was a random add on to the post but I love Gordon Ramsey and I find this commercial hilarious!

Sunday, November 27, 2011

The thankless truth...

I've had an attitude of gratitude on my mind this whole past week. I think tonight I realized something though!

Harmon just traipsed into my room. He was crying b/c he couldn't find something, he won't go to sleep, Daddy is mean, etc. and so I let him sit next to me. Poor Chris has had it up to here with that boy. I know that look of total utter frustration. Being real sick and him having to hold down the fort this past week. Those kids are driving him batty.


I think he is going to be giddy going back to work tomorrow. When you work outside the home and you do a good job you normally feel good about it! You get positive feedback, have friends at work, earn money, etc. Being at home is difficult. Kids don't express appreciation like adults do. You love them though and you want to give them the world, but it is hard.


I don't think either of us knew what our parent's gave up and sacrificed for us until we became parents. Chris made me laugh b/c he texted his mom on Thanksgiving something to the effect of: "Mom now I understand how difficult it is to put together a whole Thanksgiving and than clean up afterwards... Sorry I didn't help more and thanks for everything!" I think about my mom who stayed at home for about 18 yrs just raising kids... I don't know how she did it! That chick must have had angels on her shoulders helping her.


So besides not appreciating my parents I also don't think I always appreciate my husband. Heaven knows he doesn't always appreciate me ;) Chris did so much this extended weekend to help me get better. Just slowing down and watching him in action made me glad for everything is his doing. We have had rough spots recently but we have really overcome a lot of it. I think if we can express our appreciation more it will make things all the better. So Chris, thank you for everything you gave the kids and me this weekend and always!

So I guess all this gratitude thinking has me realizing... I need to be letting people know more all the wonderful things people do for me. But moreover I need to let those closest people know that I appreciate them.

A quick note about me...


If you follow this blog I'm sure if I mention "hey I'm sick again"... the response is going to be "WHAT???" Why is she always sick? I don't talk about it much on the blog or in real life. This condition but it doesn't define me. Nevertheless the challenges do affect my life.


I have RA and the only way to treat it is by suppressing the immune system. As it has progressed significantly this past two years the medications are more serious. With that comes new consequences. One of which is that my body is unable to fight off anything these days. If the kids get sick, I will likely get sick. This has almost landed me in the hospital at one point in the past year. I'm hoping if I continue to eat healthy, stay active, and keep a good attitude my body might be able to fight these things off better. Currently I have a serious chest infection and what looks to be endometriosis. It isn't fun, but it will pass; these things always do. In the mean time I'm trying to focus on all of the positive I've got going on and not worrying about that which I can't change.


Thursday, November 24, 2011

Thanksgiving Thanks!



My husband asked if I had a nice Thanksgiving... The answer was a resounding yes. It was just so peaceful. I don't remember a holiday lacking any sort of contention or worry. I'm sick again... what else is new. Knowing this, and knowing I'm just not the big meal cooking type Chris took over EVERYTHING. He did the most amazing job cooking it all: stuffing, sweet potato pie, full turkey, mashed potatoes, etc. I was amazed. He did such a great job. I think he should take over every year :)


My parents came. It was lovely to see them. I would lie if I didn't admit that it is hard for Chris and I not to see our extended family (and I know they missed us) but it is worth it not to feel so torn trying to please everyone.


Afterward we took the kids to go see the Smurfs at the dollar theatre. Thank Heaven's there were no other people in the movie b/c those kids acted like wild turkeys. I don't think we will be doing the regular movies anytime soon again. Nevertheless everything was so nice. I've got a lot to be grateful for!

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

So many people to be thankful for!


Today was just a really hard day for me. I overdid it last night and than I had invited fellow mom friends who were not traveling today to come over and make Advent Calendars. I also had a transition meeting with Rachel's Service Coordinator Jorge who comes over weekly to work with her on developmental milestones.


So rather than feeling just overwhelmed on a day off I just had a good time. Nothing was ready when my mom friends came over. We all had a great time though and no one minded. our nanny Miriam and I have grown to love these ladies. Than I went and grabbed pizza, this way Miriam and Jorge could just chill while we all discussed Rachel's transition in August.


Chris got home a little after one so we let Miriam off early (she doesn't do holidays but she loves paid time off like all of us). I realized that even though I was tired I had my beautiful babies, a sweet husband, and just so many wonderful people surrounding us. When Rachel and Callum do transition I'm going to miss all our early intervention friends that we have made. I love our mom friends!!! I hope we remain close for years to come :) Than there is Miriam. She is like a sister to me. I'm so grateful everyday she has stayed with our family for so long. The love she gives my children is beyond diamonds and I've grown to just love her. When she does move on (b/c she is too overqualified for us) it will break my heart. She is just the best! I know it will be a lifelong friendship though when it is time ::heart::

So this Thanksgiving I'm going to be counting my blessings; but today I got an early start just by looking around and seeing the amazing beautiful people who filled our home this morning.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Dressing Up and Speaking Up...


Anyone who knows Chris and I knows we love jeans, t-shirts, and chilling at a little hole-in-the-wall restaurant! To us that is romance. Tonight though we ended up at a formal dinner where the Governor was again the keynote speaker. I was very proud of Chris. He is gets shy talking to people at these sorts of things but he talked to everyone and we had a really good time.

I also got out of my own comfort zone tonight. Last time we did this I did meet the Governor but I never really spoke with her. Tonight when it was over there were not many people left so I went and said hi. I thanked her for her support of small business and we talked about growing up in El Paso. Where I am proud of myself though is that I also mentioned what was going on with our school district exiting special ed kids en masse. We talked Harmon and Rachel a little and she shared with me some of her experiences. She told me that some of the things the school had been telling me about funding were not really true and that her office will be looking into why so many students are being exited so quickly. I doubt anything will come of this but if just by chance something good does come of it that would be neat.


With all of that though I guess when it comes down to it I just loved being with my husband. It was fun and romantic. We need to hang out with adults more often!

PS: Thanks to all the ladies who helped dress me. You know who you are ;)

Monday, November 21, 2011

The latest in RIDICULOUS Barbie dolls!

I needed to go to Kohls looking for new shoes and so we took the kids to play in the toy section. This is where I saw the following ridiculousness:


Yes, in Barbieville, the cops wear micro-mini skirts! My inner-feminist just cries when I see things like this :(

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Turkey War Resolutions and New Traditions...

Well the other day I wrote about being frustrated with Thanksgiving. I just feel that we are getting sort of stuck between Chris' and my families history of traditions. It has been hard for us creating our own family traditions. At church it sort of hit Chris though that it was important to start creating those traditions.

So that means no AZ for a Cakes family reunion and no El Paso even for a homestyle Abuelita Thanksgiving (Heaven help me I still haven't told my mom). It is hard on both our sides. We don't want to hurt our respective families. Still if we don't set boundaries now we will be holiday ping pong fodder for generations to come. Holidays will be in our home, this year and the rest of the years... until one day our married kids tell us "mom, we do Thanksgiving at our house."


The plan is simple. I'll make Bobby Flay's turkey, Paula Deen's stuffing (I gotta incorporate some of those Southern faves of Chris' into the meal), his mom's green bean casserole (the one on the French's cans), and my mom's sweet potato pie recipe. It will be a touch of old in a new family. Anyone and everyone will always be invited :) Afterward in honor of one of Chris' beloved traditions we will take the critters to the movies. After all if we eat at noon we have to do something to entertain ourselves. This of course means I probably won't do Black Friday b/c my health has been shaky but I'm giving up something good for something better!

Saturday, November 19, 2011

Good, Better, Best: Choosing the Better Part!

Today Chris and I took some time away from the kids and discussed some important things. Bonus and pay raises are around the corner and so this is just the best time to make a plan for the next year. That meant looking at next years budget, traveling in the next year, work, the transition from Miriam to pre-school that will be occurring next fall, and if I would keep taking classes to bring me closer to my personal goal of furthering my education. We also discussed my needing surgery possibly during the holidays.

I think I wanted to just CRY!!!! It is overwhelming thinking about all the different things going on. I think that is when I remembered a talk I once read.


The speaker said the following: "We have to forego some good things in order to choose others that are better or best... We should begin by recognizing the reality that just because something is good is not a sufficient reason for doing it. The number of good things we can do far exceeds the time available to accomplish them. Some things are better than good, and these are the things that should command priority attention in our lives... There is no easy formula for that contest of priorities. However, I have never known of a man who looked back on his working life and said, “I just didn’t spend enough time with my job.” (Source)

It is pretty obvious what the best thing we have in our life is: our marriage and our children. So the trick is for Chris and I will always be is to balance the other needs and goals so they reflect those values. I'm still overwhelmed but remembering this basic truth is very comforting.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Ho Hum on Santa!


If you are my mom, please don't read this post!!!!!

If since I could remember I never believed that Santa was for sure real. I always had serious doubts from day one. I would find the gifts my parents had hidden and see them marked for Santa. I would see Walmart tags on gifts that Elves supposedly had made. My older siblings would let it slip that it was sort of a myth. I think as a small child I figured he existed somewhere but never visited my home. I believed in the spirit (and I still do in a strange way) but I never looked at him as some physical real being. It was peaceful for me knowing. I never had false expectations.

Well now if you ask anyone I'm EVIL! I'm a grinch!!! Who doesn't believe in Santa? You see this is the year I'm supposed to start teaching the kids about Santa. But I don't know if I want to perpetuate the idea of him visiting our home and tagging gifts. I would rather teach that Santa is more like The Little Mermaid. He is out there somewhere doing good and we need to help him by helping others

Chris thinks I'm horrible (even though as a child he thought Santa HATED him b/c Santa got his rich friends better gifts than he ever got). Robbing them of childhood innocence. I suppose if he really is persistent on it I will cave and let the kids bake cookies and threaten them when they are bad that Santa is watching. I'm hoping though he will back down a little, but if he doesn't I will relent. The spirit of Christmas shouldn't be contention after all.


I just think it is funny that one can feel this way and everyone think I'm crazy. Maybe I am. After all this is what happens when you are the youngest of a blended family and your earliest Christmas memories were of watching Gremlins!!!! (I'm still scared of those things... I think it is really the only thing that can still creep me out but I was like 4 when I saw it for the first time).

Monday, November 14, 2011

The GREAT Turkey War!

I've had to fight really hard to convince my family and Chris that holidays for children should be in their home. This is something I grew up with and I feel it is important. We always had the most special events in our home growing up. This included opening gifts on Christmas morning and Thanksgiving dinner.


Unfortunately if you ask the grandparents (Chris' side) or the Abuelitos (my side) those traditions should be done in their home or worse we should have to drive cross country with Great-Grandparents. So for the last 5 years of our marriage we have been playing tug of war and compromising. The final compromise was that we celebrate the main parts in our home and than (assuming they are in town) we will take a little time and visit each of the families. In the mean time if either side wants to attend the main event in our home they are welcome to attend.



So what is the problem? Well even though Chris and I agree the families still want it their way. Chris' family is traveling to Phoenix (even though they all live here to go have a reunion) and so there is the pressure there (and it is a full court press). Than there is the fact that Chris really loves my mom's food. For an Abuelita born in Puerto Rico the chick can cook a bird and do the good old fashioned southern fixings. Chris goes crazy for it!!!! So now there is pressure for me not to even really cook and just go over there to eat. After all... I've been having some complications with my condition and he doesn't want me to overdo it (like I'm buying that one).


Alas this is a pain in the neck. I can either insist on cooking for Thanksgiving (you would think my spouse would be excited with the idea of his wife actually cooking) and force everyone in my family (including my siblings and parents) to endure two full meals on Thanksgiving. Or cave and do Tamales or turkey sandwiches. Chris promises it is only for this year because he really is worried about my health. Nevertheless I worry that all these years of me fighting for Holiday respect is out the window b/c my mom is the Latina Paula Deen. I'll probably give in but heck no is she beating me out on Christmas!!!!

Sunday, November 13, 2011

That bratty little sister!

So I took a blog vacation! It had to be done. In one week I've been sick (got a chest cold), fighting the school district to keep Harm's services, and dealing 9,000 other things for work and school!


So I didn't know what to write about until I was thinking about my baby girl. She is a lot like me! The boys are just the best of friends. They each have their own trains and they love playing together. I think Rach gets jealous b/c she goes in there and steals a handful of trains and runs away. Not b/c she likes trains (she doesn't) but rather to get their goat. She also does other things like hide their loveys and do other things to get their goat.

I don't blame her. I think she feels left out honestly but for peace sake she can't do it and not face consequences. Times like this I wish she could have a little sister, but that means I would have to have another child... that just ain't worth! So instead I'm just going to hang in there and try give her extra love so maybe she won't torture her brothers so much.

Monday, November 7, 2011

Monkey's Blood, Fortune Telling, and the other weird things my parents did to me!

Today I was reading poetry and came across a great one. It is called, "Puerto Rican Obituary" by Pedro Pietri. It made me think of culture and upbringing. No matter where I go I get teased a lot but I also get a lot of inquiries about how a "normal person" like me can believe in such things as ghosts or have been a fortune teller. I don't know what to say. It is how I was raised. Chris teases me mercilessly that I was definitely not raised like a normal person! It is true I wasn't. This is why I started laughing when I read this poem for the following lines.

Is time
to visit sister lopez again
the number one healer
and fortune card dealer
in Spanish Harlem
She can communicate
with your late relatives
for a reasonable fee
Good news is guaranteed

That is how I was raised. It was so different. We were taught ghosts, angels, and aliens were totally normal. I was taken to psychic fairs on the weekend growing up and taught to read cards and stuff... don't all kids?


When my friends would cut themselves their mother's put Neosporin on their wounds. My mother though still spits at that stuff claiming it is a conspiracy to cause infection and make you go to the hospital. We had to have Mecuro (it is called Monkeys Blood and died our skin red for weeks) and we were not allowed bandaids b/c they cause infection too.



When we got sick we were not taken to the doctor or given medicine right away. Instead my mother would go find a tea for that. Sometimes she grew the herbs in the front yard but our pet ducks would eat it (another interesting thing was living in the city and having rabbits, ducks and chickens as pets). I still to this day can't go near an herbal tea! They were nasty. What was wrong with Pepto Bismal.


Other funny things were: I was never allowed to cut my hair. My mom's family and our family speak so loudly (and it is often interspersed with curse words, something I'm trying hard to drop for my own kids sake); we are not mad at each other but rather just very animated. We say what is on our mind. I would get dumped and my mom would say "get over it, he was a loser, now go do you homework).

My family!

It isn't all bad though. This is why we love big parties and we love food! I was raised where "family is family, and you will have each other" so even now my siblings and I fiercely protect each other. We also laugh and laugh. That was part of why Chris fell in love with me. There is a feeling of welcoming everyone and serving. It makes me want to always be helping others now as an adult. Honesty was always a cornerstone in my home growing up. My parents made it clear money doesn't matter as much as being a good person matters!



Sometimes I wonder how my culture will melt with Chris' (which is a more "All American" style). I think we will skip the psychic fairs and card readings but definitely keep the huge parties! I wonder if my kids will one day be writing blogs about the horrid things their mom did. I think that is a given. I wonder what they will take as adults. I guess I just hope they will have a strong faith in God, a heart filled with love, and still love to laugh. They also better still love the Texas Longhorns ;)



Sunday, November 6, 2011

Time changes are NOT FUN!

I hate you Benjamin Franklin!

I used to love Fall Back when I was a little. It meant we could actually make McDonald's breakfast for once when I was little. In college it meant an extra hour of sleep. After college it meant I could stay out later the night before and still make it to church. Alas those days are over!


Now I have kids and Daylight's Saving Time doesn't work! The kids didn't get the memo. So Chris kept them up late last night. They still woke up when they usually do, so the whole day they have been cranky monsters. On Facebook some of my friends bragged about their kids doing great... THAT WAS NOT MY FAMILY. Ugh, I wish we lived in Russia, they don't have DST over there!!!

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

It is beginning to look a lot like Christmas!


I'm a horrible person. Today I was shopping with the kids and Chris. I was in a crummy mood (still catching up on work after too much Halloween and very moody little kids). Anyhow as I started sifting through the Halloween Clearance section the store was blasting Christmas Carols. Suddenly I stopped being sullen and started humming. Cally our resident musician quickly got into it as well. Chris and I are dancing in the aisles.


Christopher is horrified. He thinks I am disrespecting the bird. I'm not, but the bird ain't anything compared to my good friends Rudolph and Frosty. So we are at odds. Thanksgiving is his favorite holiday (he loves to eat). So I guess I will have to wait till Black Friday to put up the decorations...


But I'm excited! See my side ticker!!!! Also Callum is excited too. He threw this cd into the cart and Daddy didn't catch... perhaps I will have to put the carols on early.

Daisypath Christmas tickers

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Halloweenitis...


Our family is suffering from a serious condition: TOO MUCH HALLOWEEN! We came, we saw, and we trick or treated!


Rachel got sick from all the candy at one of our 3 scheduled parties on Friday. Cally almost got eaten by a lion. Both Chris and I are horribly behind on work. Harmon though was the saddest tale. Last night we did our Tricks or Treats and one guy had a scary garage and scared him. He was so scared last night he wouldn't go to bed and after he finally did he couldn't sleep. He woke up about 4 times and kept sneaking into our bed. When Daddy would go to move him back to his room he would say, "Leave me alone Daddy, I'm not doing anything!" I felt so bad for him. We will be more careful where we go next year.


So does this mean we are scaling back? Nah! It was a great year. I've learned to control the candy consumption and will be more careful where we trick or treat. Otherwise I wouldn't change a thing. We had 2 great parties, celebrated with so many great friends, had some special moments with our kids at the various activities, and just had a great time.


The only thing that I still wonder though is: who took our Halloween candy??? We never had a trick or treater I noticed the full bucket when we got home at 9:30 (it is a gated community) but this morning when Miriam got to work the bucket we had left outside was mysteriously empty... I'm glad! They took all our crummy candy we had amassed that past few months from pinatas and other special events. Now we can sit back and enjoy the kids good chocolate!!!!