Life just doesn't have a script...

In 4 weeks

We lost our puppy... We had Thanksgiving in at Cracker Barrel...  I was offered a life changing offer... Harmon can now write his first and last name... Chris built more houses... Rachel is convinced me to give her a makeup kit... Callum learned to absolutely love the Tran-siberian Orchestra...  I've learned to start waking up early... Harmon has hair now...  We adopted a new puppy... We met dinosaurs... Chris is putting up Christmas lights before Christmas Eve... Cally faced a cleft palette clinic...  We got new sheets...  We tried to buy a haunted mansion... Harmon officially exited out of speech therapy for the first time since he was 18 months... Miriam is officially going to continue working with our family... I won scholarships for my writing here at NMSU... We are torturing our wonderful realtor looking at a new lot to build...  My work on the Holocaust was chosen for a national writing contest... Rachel has decided she is going to become a cheerleader...  Harmon served several goals this season at soccer... Cally decided he is going to marry a little girl in his class... Oh and the cats still hate Chris!

This blog isn't about our kids.  It isn't about me or Chris.  It is our story.  It is so important that I maintain this but right now I just feel like things don't stop.  

At night I try to stop and just let everything go but my mind is just spinning.  Last night I laid down and watched all my "The Soup" episodes I had saved on my TiVo and than went through a couple weeks of Jon Stewart episodes.  

Today I went to the NMSU speech clinic to exit Harmon and get Cally some therapy with his nasal sounds.  They told me to sit down.  Callum had gone to a cleft palette clinic over a month ago and they told us it looked good.  Well it looked good for him not having a subcutaneous cleft palette.  Now after review of the endoscopy it looks like instead he has this type of internal cleft called an occult cleft.  I wish I knew more but in time I will learn what this is.

I could be angry.  I could be worried.  I just know it is going to be okay.  I still think they could be wrong, but if not... Oh well!  Life goes on.  He will be okay.  It is going to be really okay.  We will be okay.  I just have to always keep reminding myself that.

Harmon took losing Kenzie harder than the twins did.  He kept telling me everyday, "Momma my heart hurts."  Finally after like 6 whole days you know we caved and started a national search for a new dog.  We found Madelyn who is the same type of mix Kenzie was.  Harmon loves Maddie so much.  This is HIS dog.  but at the same time he still tells me he misses Kenzie.  It makes me so happy.  I don't want him forgetting about our little puppy.  I miss her still so much.  I think I always will have a place in my heart for my little Kenzie.  I just didn't know how much I loved her until she was gone.  Maddie will never be Kenzie but she is Maddie and she is a cutie (above is Maddie coming home from ABQ and below is my last picture of Kenzie from two months ago after my poor grooming).

There are a lot of neat things about to happen!

Rachel's first dance recital is on Saturday!!!  We are also officially celebrating Christmas and Hanukkah this year.  Tomorrow is my awards ceremony for school.  

  I promise more blogging to come!