Eight Crazy Days and Nights...

I have always considered myself to have two faiths.  I'm LDS but being Jewish will always be part of me.  Of course explaining this to my children is always really confusing.  So is that whole they are Puerto Rican thing.  I don't think they get it at all but that is okay, all these things will come in time.  

Right now though I am starting to teach a little more about the Jewish faith.  I've meant too for a long time but honestly I've been meaning to dye Easter eggs with the kids for 4 years but I never get around to it.  I still have the kit from when I lived in Las Vegas.  But after getting some encouragement from my professors and Jewish friends we have started with an easy one: Hanukkah.  

Of course the kids were thoroughly confused but when I told them they got a small gift each night their love of Hanukkah grew.  The stories I shared though were not that interesting so thankfully Elmo stepped in.  



To be honest our celebration isn't exactly kosher but at least it is a start :)  It goes well with our un-kosher Christian holidays!

It is over!!! at least till January...

Tonight I finished my semester.  Why I thought it would be an awesome to do school full time is a mystery to me.  Like I really just didn't have enough stuff to do late at night and during my lunch breaks.  Really I just wasting time at 5 am doing all that sleeping :p

It has been hard but really worth it.  I won a scholarship for the second year in a row.  It makes me think I can spellz but at least my writing is something worth reading.  I love learning and it really has been a joy for me... mostly.  I went back to school because I missed learning (and telling people you studied theater wasn't exactly winning me over any respect, I might as well have gone to UT for underwater basket weaving).

Now I have to retake my GRE next Friday and my GMAT in January.  All my applications need to be finished before the new year.  After that it is just really waiting to see for sure what my options and than I really need to decide what I'm going to do when I grow up!  

Tonight is a milestone.  I think I feel like women are often expected to give up so much when they have kids.  But my life isn't on hold and my family isn't suffering.  I realize I can do anything I want and have it all, except maybe sleep :p

Rachel's Big Milestone!!!

I don't think I will ever stop being amazed by little Rachel.  She does so much and she is just amazing.  This weekend was her dance recital and she rocked it!!!  She was just a dolly by golly.  

Below are the videos

Life just doesn't have a script...

In 4 weeks

We lost our puppy... We had Thanksgiving in at Cracker Barrel...  I was offered a life changing offer... Harmon can now write his first and last name... Chris built more houses... Rachel is convinced me to give her a makeup kit... Callum learned to absolutely love the Tran-siberian Orchestra...  I've learned to start waking up early... Harmon has hair now...  We adopted a new puppy... We met dinosaurs... Chris is putting up Christmas lights before Christmas Eve... Cally faced a cleft palette clinic...  We got new sheets...  We tried to buy a haunted mansion... Harmon officially exited out of speech therapy for the first time since he was 18 months... Miriam is officially going to continue working with our family... I won scholarships for my writing here at NMSU... We are torturing our wonderful realtor looking at a new lot to build...  My work on the Holocaust was chosen for a national writing contest... Rachel has decided she is going to become a cheerleader...  Harmon served several goals this season at soccer... Cally decided he is going to marry a little girl in his class... Oh and the cats still hate Chris!

This blog isn't about our kids.  It isn't about me or Chris.  It is our story.  It is so important that I maintain this but right now I just feel like things don't stop.  

At night I try to stop and just let everything go but my mind is just spinning.  Last night I laid down and watched all my "The Soup" episodes I had saved on my TiVo and than went through a couple weeks of Jon Stewart episodes.  

Today I went to the NMSU speech clinic to exit Harmon and get Cally some therapy with his nasal sounds.  They told me to sit down.  Callum had gone to a cleft palette clinic over a month ago and they told us it looked good.  Well it looked good for him not having a subcutaneous cleft palette.  Now after review of the endoscopy it looks like instead he has this type of internal cleft called an occult cleft.  I wish I knew more but in time I will learn what this is.

I could be angry.  I could be worried.  I just know it is going to be okay.  I still think they could be wrong, but if not... Oh well!  Life goes on.  He will be okay.  It is going to be really okay.  We will be okay.  I just have to always keep reminding myself that.

Harmon took losing Kenzie harder than the twins did.  He kept telling me everyday, "Momma my heart hurts."  Finally after like 6 whole days you know we caved and started a national search for a new dog.  We found Madelyn who is the same type of mix Kenzie was.  Harmon loves Maddie so much.  This is HIS dog.  but at the same time he still tells me he misses Kenzie.  It makes me so happy.  I don't want him forgetting about our little puppy.  I miss her still so much.  I think I always will have a place in my heart for my little Kenzie.  I just didn't know how much I loved her until she was gone.  Maddie will never be Kenzie but she is Maddie and she is a cutie (above is Maddie coming home from ABQ and below is my last picture of Kenzie from two months ago after my poor grooming).

There are a lot of neat things about to happen!

Rachel's first dance recital is on Saturday!!!  We are also officially celebrating Christmas and Hanukkah this year.  Tomorrow is my awards ceremony for school.  

  I promise more blogging to come!

Remembering...

I have not been doing my usual blogging at all this last month or so.  One of the reasons is because I was working on a project for my business ethics class.  I didn't have to do everything I did for the project but I wanted too because the subject was about the Holocaust.  Here is video part which is a small part of the actual project.

 I wanted to share it because of my background this event in history has always touched me greatly.  The project goal was to analyze an ethical question involved in business. I choose to focus on Bayer but it isn't just about Bayer.  Several companies participated in these actions during the Holocaust including Ford, Coca Cola, Hugo Boss, and IBM.  Sadly several companies continue to participate in ethical misconduct around the globe which leads to the death of many in places such as South America and Sub-Saharan Africa.

When I was younger I worked with the El Paso Holocaust Memorial Museum and have shared their message how terrible things happen when quiet prejudice is allowed to grow in people's hearts.  How "good people" see hate and don't stand up against it.  So this was sort of a labor of love for me.  I hope one day I will have time to once again work with an organization such as the El Paso Holocaust Memorial Museum and share their message of peace and tolerance.  Until than I was glad to do something like this.  May we never forget!

The wailing women!

This Halloween I cried a lot!!!  

That is because I played La Llorona at the Farm and Ranch Museums "Time Travelers Ghost Tour".  It was so much fun.  As a small child I would dance for hours and than I did theater for several years.  I hadn't acted though since I sang the part of Sally Brown in "Your'e a Good Man Charlie Brown" when I was pregnant with Harmon.  It was a lot of fun.  I hate being away from my kids like I was for a few days but I'm glad I did it.

Help me find my puppy!!!!

Never mind... She was found and has passed away.


Please help spread the word! I was busy studying last night and Chris had the babies and my puppy with him. Sometime last night in Las Cruces NM she left the car. Probably when he was getting mail.



Kenzie is such an important part of our little family. She has been with me since I got married. She watches over the babies and stays with during my late nights working. She is just a little angel. If you have seen her please let us know and help spread the word if you are local!

Please contact me right away at franciscainvegas@yahoo.com.

Kenzie passed on!

I don't feel like going into details right now.  But she was found today.  Tonight I will try and share some special memories of her.

My Little Evil Genius!!!

Callum's name means calm and peace which is very fitting for his character but sometimes it is the quiet ones who you have to watch out for!  This kid really reminds me of Bart Simpson's: no one ever suspects the butterfly.

The other day during church I was trying to keep the babies happy so I let them have a little bag of Teddy Grahams mid-way through the service.  This little distraction helps break the monotony of the time but this time it just back fired on me.  Cally started singing the Smurf song loudly while dancing his little Teddy Grahams all over the pews.  Okay that was embarrassing but than when he than started voicing Godzilla attacking the Teddy Grahams violently and the Teddy Grahams had to beg for their little lives I was mortified and laughing my head off at the same time.  Than it got worse... he would bite their heads off and than start maniacally laughing loudly like and angry villain.

Yup, don't be fooled by his cuteness!  He has a streak of maniacal genius in him.  I never would have guessed a few years ago it would have been him out of the three but it is.  Harmon is always Buzz Lightyear and Callum happily is the Emperor Zurg.  Harmon loves Thomas the Train while Callum is obsessed with Diesel 10.  This clip of in Misty Island rescue is Callum's very favorite.  He just loves it and watches it 20 times in a row and copies the laugh.



The thing is that several of us in my family have a bit of a dark side, including myself.  Callum is just a chip off the old dark block that is me.  Still if I ever see Harmon and him playing out Pinky and the Brain I may need to say something.

I really don't want him actually taking over the world.  I also should probably do Cheese Nips next Sunday at Church.

Scary Cheesiness!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHH!!!!

This is a really busy time of year for me.  So what in God's green earth was I thinking???  

Every year we go all out for Halloween.  After much thought I honestly think we do as many activities for Halloween as we do for Christmas.  Anyhow as I mentioned last blog the real big change in our home is the kids embracing Charlie Browns, the Great Pumpkin.  So Rachel as asked to be a ghost for Halloween.  Of course I had already bought costumes.  Oops!  So what did I do?  I of course went and made some new costumes for her and I... 

Last month I saw this costume in a parenting magazine.  I thought it was adorable but the responses were: it looks like the Hamburgler.  So I rethought it and this is what we came up with...

Rachel

Me

I also made the little dress for her at the top of the page.  I still need to find some tights this weekend and make some neat bows but at least I'm done.  I still can't believe I took the time to do it but I figure Rachel isn't getting any smaller and soon one day she won't want her mommy and her to wear matching ghost costumes.  With everything going on I need to make sure these special things are not lost!  So anyone who is mad at me for not getting something done please, watch out or I will haunt you!

I iz a good Mom?!?!

Yes, I did it!  I did the unthinkable!  I forgot to pick my daughter up from school yesterday.  It wasn't that bad.  The students are officially out at 2:30 and I realized at 2:29 that I had forgotten that I needed to pick her up.  So I broke a few speeding rules and perhaps made a few jaywalkers think twice about their unruly behavior but I got to the school at 2:40.  

Now if Rachel had been a teenager one might think 10 minutes is no big deal but when you have a wee three year old, it is a big deal.  I was apologizing to her teacher profusely and the teacher teased me: "don't worry, you only big black mark on your record now".  

My heart sank.  "But, I'm so sorry...  I am trying the best I can".  Rachel's teacher saw my distress and replied she was only teasing.  Still I felt bad.  Than we started talking about what it is like to be a working parent.  That occasion taught me some valuable lessons.  First of which, I'm not alone.  Second, that I am a good mom.

The idea of feeling like you have to do everything and because you are doing everything nothing is up to the standards you wish they were at.  That is how I feel.  I feel like my work gets the short end of the stick and so do my kids.  I don't have time for PTA's or Field Trips and as much as I hate to admit it I'm the mom who leaves her kid's work in their back pack for a month.  I think of all I could do work wise if I wasn't always tied up with IEP meetings and doctor's appointments.

In talking with her teacher I realized something though.  We may feel as parents we don't do enough but you have to give yourself a break.  Are my kids well fed, happy, well behaved, and clean?  ALWAYS!  Is my home always clean, do I have home cooked meals piping hot at the stove, or is my work desk free of paper piles and my inbox empty?  NEVER!!!  

I'm learning the hard way that I continually have to put my existence into perspective.  After the accident the people who helped with our kids told me how well behaved and kind my kids are.  I couldn't believe it, thinking maybe these friends and family members had my kids or alien pod children; but after I was released from the trauma center after a week of being gone I went home and indeed they were my children.  

Since that experience my perspective has changed a lot.  The kids all do wonderfully in school and their teachers adore them.  Recently the district had a Fall Break and so I signed the kids up for a day camp.  When I went to pick them up the women in charge told me she was so worried about them because the minimum age for the kids was six (which they forgot to mention in the letter) and the twins were barely three.  Nevertheless my babies she told me were the best in the class as per behavior.  Another lady mentioned she calls Rachel, "the please and thank you" girl because she always is saying "please" and "thank you".

I wish I could say this was all me.  It isn't!  I have an amazing support group.  The children's school, Rachel's DD-Pre class, family, friends, different early intervention therapists, and of course my WONDERFUL Miriam (yes she still is their nanny even though we said we would be parting soon) all support the raising of my babies.  I can't do it all but with a team like this behind me to support these children, my babies are turning out quite well.  Part of being a good parent is to ensure when you can't be there that the kids have plenty of support.

Hillary Clinton said, "It takes a village to raise a child".  I couldn't agree more.  While I may never learn how to make a home cooked meal every night I do know how to be there for my children and when it comes down to it this is why God created Schwans food delivery!

Chilling with Charlie and Ichabod...

On the first day of October we always celebrate the coming of Fall.  This year was no different except we did it on October Eve because I had an engagement that Monday.  

We make homemade Pumpkin cake, and put on our perennial favorite of Charlie Brown, Ichabod Crane, and our newest love Scooby Doo!  We have put these videos on for the kids every year and every year they have disliked them.  I was always secretly sad about that.  This year though my kids have gained a new maturity and they now LOVE the classics.  Their favorite thing is when Charlie Brown is trick or treating.  They will play pretend now and take turns saying: "I got a lollipop", "I got a candy bar", "I got a rock..."

Scooby Doo is really great because our kids are like other kids.  They get a little freaked out with all the spooky stuff (retro picture of Harm when he was 3 at Spirit).  But in Scooby Doo they always solve the mysteries.  The spooky stuff is proven to be all make believe.  That has been very beneficial because now the monsters and everything else is just make believe to them.

So now the spooky is fun!  My kids love witches, blood, and skeletons.  I believe in certain supernatural forces but in Halloween's case it is just fun to have fun.  Chris is disturbed how much the kids are getting into it but he is still getting used to marrying into "The Addams Family" and my kids are just like me!

Opposing forces: Fun vs Work

I am blog slouch.  In fact I'm sitting here in a business ethics class listening to a debate heteroglassia.  Oh well, at least I am blogging.  

So the last blog I wrote after this blog we were in Albuquerque.  In less than a month we have had to go from Phoenix to Albuquerque to El Paso and back.  The reason is because of possible expansion and also I am getting great options for continuing education.  What we decided for now is that I need to stay put at least till May because of the kids and the fact is we are all drowning in work.

So what is else is going on?  Well October is our favorite month!  We sit and watch Scooby Doo, Charlie Brown, Ichabod Crane and other great classics all month long.  This is the month where we do the County Fair, Corn Mazes, and Boo at the Zoo.  This year we are only doing one party.  I'm happy about that one.  School for the kids is doing well but we are struggling to balance pre-k, DD-Pre, speech, and physical therapy for Rachel. 

Finding the time to sit and go "ahhh" that is the challenge as always with life!

Midnight Road Trip...

I'm always so amazed by my friends children who can sleep in the car. I'm always having people tell: travel late at night or early in the morning. My kids that doesn't work! We couldn't leave till late tonight and the kids never slept. In fact I just got them asleep. It's past midnight and Harmon wanted to go swimming (and was mad at Daddy for not taking him), Rachel was calling room service, and Cally was philosophizing over "the magical clock". This is why we get a suite.



As tired as I am right now I wanted to remember these moments. The twins are just so funny and cute how they work in synchronicity with their curly hair and devilish grins I almost want to overlook the messes they are causing, Harmon was just so precious. He had night terrors last night and they made him a little queasy so while the twins went to Halloween camp he took turns going to work with mom and dad. He was really just preciously sweet tonight. He asked me if I loved him as much as I loved the twins and I told him of course! We talked about why we brought them this time and he told me he was happy.



My day to day feels like a blender. Sometimes I just wish I could stop and enjoy them as I did just now. Not having Miriam around this week and having school go on Fall Break has been a little bit of a nightmare for me but I'm glad for it. I miss a lot with them and this week I was able to catch up a little on these moments. Even though there has already been a lot of screaming, fighting, and crying I'm glad to have my midnight warriors with me. Each little baby I have is unique and special.

Hopefully tomorrow the to do list and the fun lists don't clash too much but most of all I just really hope these munchkins sleep in :p


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

War and Peace

When I decided I was going to have 2 children I really hoped for a boy secretly.  I did that b/c my husband is best friends with his brothers and my brothers are very close as well.  I wanted Harm to have a brother.  These two couldn't be closer.

I couldn't come up with a name for a second name for a little boy except Brighton.  Chris hated Brighton.  So I went searching for a new boys name.  I found Callum on nymbler.com when I put the name Harmon in.  It meant peace. Harm's name meant war.  So my boys are: War and Peace.  Yes, I am that bad of a literary nerd.  For the most part their names have been a little prophetic... well until the school year started!

Harmon:

Harm is doing so well.  We started him into a private pre-school program that integrates his  special needs therapy.  It has been great.  I really think the teachers are doing more here than the teachers at the schools.  They are teaching Harm self-regulation.  If he needs oral-motor stimulation he has cards he can choose from and do something like chewing on a special pencil chewer or put a spicy candy in his mouth.  They are working on eye contact, speech, listening, etc.  They are amazing.

I was really worried how this would go.  The biggest difference between his school now and and his old school is that this program is fully integrated.  There are a handful like Harm who have special needs and there were all types of special needs kids.  In this school Rachel and Harm are the most severe.  Other than them there are a few speech delayed kids or motor wise but MOST are typical peers.

He does great!  He was the only new kid in his class and they picked on him a little the first week.  Than Friday the boys all had a race and Harm won.  After that he was cool and he still wins a lot of the races.  I still worry some days he is going to get written up for getting out of sorts and attacking.  There is a no tolerance policy for things like biting and hitting.  The other day he told me: "I got a note but it is bad... I'm not going to show you."  Of course he finally showed me and it was for talking!  Not biting, or yelling but just talking during class!!!  It was awesome :) 

He is so special to me.  I remember the days I worked full time and he was a little baby.  He went everywhere with me.  To this day he is always the child who knows me best.  The last time I was not feeling well, he sat in my bedroom drawing.  When Daddy asked him to come play with him he said "No I'm playing with my mom".  Later that day I told him how nice it was that he came to stay with me and he told me: mommy it is my job to protect and take care of you.  Other times he will tell me, "when Daddy is working late I'm the man of the house!"

At home he is really stepping into a great leadership role.  We still have some really tough days where he is just out of sorts but he is doing his chores, doing extra chores, helping me, protecting his brother and sister in school, and so forth.  It is neat to see how well he is doing.  I have always known Harmon is an amazing wonderful but now it is nice to see everyone else in this world of his is seeing that!


Callum:

Callum is not happy with Mommy!  In fact he is downright miserable.  He has been giving me nothing but total Hell for sending him to school.  I don't blame him.  If I could stay home and play all day I would totally choose that.  I guess with Rachel she is getting over her school sickness but Callum is still mad at me.

The thing is that Callum isn't 3 yet for his adjusted age.  He was supposed to be born on October 24.  I think he is going through the terrible 2's just a little late.  He is always my laid back baby who is perfectly chillax most days.  That is not him these days.  He loves to tease and taunt his very sensitive brother and sister.  He refuses to wear the clothes I pick for him (another Rachel) and he throws everything.  First kid of mine to ever throw his dinner plate in protest.  (He was in big trouble).  School is having likewise problems.  He won't even sit with us at the movies.  He is like a moody teenager.


The funny thing is that he is a quiet genius.  He always knows the answer to everything if he cares to put the time into answering.  Problem is he would rather walk to the beat of his own drum.  He is still just as musical.  His favorite singer is train.  Yes he is that kid who can sing an entire verse of 50 Ways to Say Goodbye: "She was caught in a mudslide, Eaten by a lion, Got run over by a crappy purple Scion, Help me, help me, I'm no good at goodbyes..."  He hates sports but oddly enough he is great at it.  Again, those skills like throwing, catching and kicking a ball are better than some kids a year or two older.

My favorite thing is his sense of humor these days.  Him and I have a special connection.  No matter how mad he is at me he loves to laugh.  We do silly faces together.  We have inside jokes like: "you're a jumbo pizza"  "no you're jumbo pizza"  We can argue that one for ten minutes.  I love to whisper him things like "I love you".  He always whispers "I love you" right back.  I know he is going through a lot of change but that is one special boy.  Hopefully he won't be mad at me forever.

(This is after his first hair cut, don't worry it was only a trim!  He is my surfer boy always!)

I knew I shoulda tooke that left turn...

I live my life a lot like Bugs Bunny.  He burrows underground and just pops out quickly to see what is going on and than burrows again.  He often gets lost.  That is me, it is crazy but it is sort of fun!  I think I should win the inconsistent blogging award!  Lets see what happened: Rachel got into the DD-Pre, Harmon is getting exited from Speech therapy, Cally is going through the terrible twos finally, and so on... let me catch everyone up.

Health wise I'm fine which really means I'M GREAT!!!  It feels good to be myself again.  Surgery went well and those problems are gone, no amoebas, and my head doesn't hurt as it has been since the accident.  I'm getting my bearings being normal again and I'm happy.  

Chris and I traveled to Phoenix last week.  I scored an interview for a really neat graduate program at ASU.  I have good shot at it but it is a highly competitive program so nothing is guaranteed.  I want this so bad but I'm struggling to balance all I have on my plate.  This program and 3 small children with my husband who also is drowning in his own work load... I just don't know if it would work.  During Rachel's IEP the Special Ed director asked why I was so tired and I told her about ASU and the program.  She sort of annoyingly said "well, children always come first"... 

I wanted to deck her but she does have a point.  My babies are not babies!!  They are all kids now.  They are totally big kids and their needs are as all encompassing as they were when they were babies.  It is just different.  Balance!!!  Things are going well with the company and it is growing a lot.  Who knows there might some moving soon :wink:  I'm going to have to figure out a way to do it all but I might need to think more on it.  So I don't know what I will do.  

Things are good though.  I am going to try today to take some time and post a special post about an update for each of the kids and do some fun Halloween posts.  It's time again :)  I will be in Albuquerque this Friday and Saturday for more adventures.  This time the kids get to come. 

No School for the Queen Bee!

Harmon and I have something in common, we are incredible super nerds who love school.    Today he asked me if tomorrow was Monday and he could go to school.  That is when Rachel made it very clear: "I don't want to go to school!!!!!"

This wasn't just a passing moment.  Every single time Chris drops her off at school in the morning she just holds onto him for dear life.  She gets so upset.  When I go to pick her up she grasps onto me with the Rachel death grip and won't let go.  She really just is not happy there.  

The funny thing about this is that she is just totally the most popular girl in the school. According to the people there the other kids think she is just a little doll.  All the little girls (and a boy) from her class and Harm's class just follow her around and compete for the spots next to her.  I kept hearing it but I didn't believe it until I saw it.  She got on a toy horse in a merry go round type toy and 5 kids crowded to be on the horses next to her.  It was pretty cute but I keep getting this fear that in a few years Rachel will be the next Regina George from Mean Girls.  Of course right now this isn't an issue.  Rachel is totally clueless that she is popular.  She just does her thing and is completely oblivious.  

On Friday she got a formal invitation to a special program to help her with her CP.  I'm sad though b/c now she will be in school all day and she doesn't want to be at school.  She just want to go home and be with her Miriam.  I keep thinking if I give her more time she will adjust but it has been over a month and now we have to add in a second program in the afternoon.  I almost want to tell Miriam: STOP don't get a new job, stay with us forever!  I just wish our little Queen Bee could stay at home and be a Princess Bee for a little longer.

The Pink Flamingos drowned!

Our running gag birthday party for the twins is Pink Flamingos in the Pool because we always have a huge water themed party for them and when their birthday comes around all the Hawaiian Luau stuff goes on sale.  So this was our 2nd annual Flamingo bash for their very special 3rd birthday!

It really was a great party except it rained.  It rained the entire day.  It was 95 degrees the day before the party and than we had a high in the 60's the day of the party.  Needless to say we put away Rachel's custom flamingo bathing suit and brought out the jackets.  We all crowded inside while the kids bundled still made the water slide into a cool dry slide.

As I always joke I am a very Type A personality and so this was not an easy day for me at first but once I saw the happiness everyone had I loosened up.  My wonderful sister came in from Vegas, we had so many great friends and family there, but most importantly my babies were happy.  That is what matters for kid parties after all.  Cally kept saying "oh wow" every gift he got and Rachel pranced around singing "Pink Flamingos in the Pool!"  Everyone had a great time and it was a wonderful.  Not as planned but in an odd way it will always be much more memorable because of that :)