Manipulation or hard negotiation?

When Chris and I come home from being gone for a day or two it is always chaos; but a very happy exhausting chaos! It is just so much fun to to be reunited. I had missed their smiles and antics so much. They missed me too I can tell. I also can appreciate things that I might not have otherwise observed. The funniest is that each has their own unique style of getting their way.

Rachel plays your classic "Damsel in Distress". I don't understand how when she never watches cartoons and is in a house with a ton of boys she can still pull this off. Where did she learn this? Anyhow when she wants something she gets her pretty green eyes and puckers the lips and gives you a oh so helpless whine. If I persist and say no she than follows you through out the house continuing her bid or goes to the other person (Miriam or Daddy often suffice) and give them that helpless look along with a "Mommy is so mean look". Something tells me she will get whatever she wants out of her future husband!

Harmon is more like a lawyer in getting his way. He asks politely "Mommy can I please" and if I say no he starts to negotiate. For example:

"Mommy can I please play with my bubbles?"

"No it is lunch time and afterwards you need to take a bath."

"How about bubbles first and than lunch?"

"No, it is time for lunch and than bath time. After your bath you can play?"

"How about lunch, than bubbles, than bath?"

Sometimes he will also pull the "I asked Miriam and she said I could" card when of course he never asked her. It amazes me that a year ago he had barely learned to say Momma and now could probably now negotiate a mob boss out of jail time.

Than finally there is Cally. He is probably the most successful in his art form of negotiation. He is very very cute. He just follows you around smiling with whatever he wants until you will do it for him. He is very patient and will outlast me no matter what. For example he had a book last night he wanted Dad to read. He followed Daddy showing him the book until he would stop and read it. Once Chris read it. He than proceeded to smile and gesture for it again. He got read that book over and over with his sweetness.

Miriam said it best today that watching each of these sweeties: watching them grow up you realize early on how unique and different each is. They are and I love them for their unique talents... even if it means they are being a little sneaky.

Growing up and growing old :o

Chris and I were already up in Albuquerque just the two of us so we decided to drop in and spend a night in Santa Fe. It had been a crazy few weeks and we had an Abuelita who was very excited to watch them. We told Harmon when we got home where we were and Harmon was overjoyed exclaiming "you went to Santa Fe to see Santa????" When we were leaving that little bug didn't even care to say good bye to us b/c he was already immersed in fun. I missed the days when he couldn't stand me leaving and couldn't wait for me to get home

I think the nicest part about the weekend was spending time together. We actually got really romantic ;) It felt like the old days. Sadly one of the highlights was just hanging out in bed watching TV (last night was a "Deadliest Catch" marathon and this morning was a "Pawn Stars" marathon). As always we spent the whole road trip up and down debating politics. We are such sad nerds.

The funniest thing was Santa Fe though. Nightlife wise on we had a choice of a grunge punk band (which is a genre I loved) and old piano bar with an even older clientele. We would have been so out of place at the grunge band bar and so we choose the piano bar. There were 50 people all about 45 to age 80 swooning over a piano man singing hits like "Michelle, My Belle" and "What a Wonderful World". Some were singing horridly and loudly out of key while others were standing shaking booty.

It was a pretty scary sight. We left going thank Heaven's we are still young but than as we tuned the radio to an "oldies" station that features music from the 90's it hit me: YOU ARE NOT THAT FAR BEHIND. Uh oh!

"As You Wish"...

I remember growing up I used to watch movies like this and think that is love? Nahh.... I think I was right. Often time in my marriage I joke we are more like Lady Gaga's song "Bad Romance". Chris and I have our differences. We are two really stubborn people with completely different world viewpoints and upbringings. Just b/c we see things differently and don't always jive doesn't mean we don't truly love each other.

We drive each other crazy over the little things. Tonight Chris insisted on forward facing the twins (one of our many ongoing debates) since he had to switch the seats into his car while mine gets body work done. When I go back to my car I will be switching them back until the twins turn two (which drives him crazy). I could get frustrated but than I see the small things he does like get me a silly gossip magazine to help me relax like he had waiting for me tonight.

Retail Therapy!!!

I think sometimes life just gets very stressful. Last night I posted a little bit from my rambling mind and if you read earlier you probably thought she is going crazy so that is why I edited for simplification this morning. Tonight I'll just keep it short.

Things are stressful but I'm hanging in there. I'm just trying to balance everything with a little optimism when sometimes I feel like I can't do everything I need to do. So tonight I went to Target for popcorn. Since I was there and had a gift card I browsed the sale rack. I found there 3 gorgeous outfits that were marked down 75% off (a beautiful blue dress w/white cardi, and two matching summer suits that are all perfect for church). I'm happy b/c I got $70 worth of clothing for 21 dollars. It is silly to be happy about finding something cute and saving a few bucks but tonight I was.

The cutest thing was that Rachel was very happy too! She saw the new clothes and had to play with them. She is such a girl!

Tomorrow I think I'm going to cancel appointments. I'm not a super hero and I need to take it a little easier for my health's sake. My mom is taking the kids overnight this weekend. At least I know I will get some sleep!!! Maybe I can convince him to leave our cell phones at home (but than again we have kids).

Potty Training dogs and kids :)

On great Harm news I think it is finally safe for me to say that Harmon is Potty Trained. While Miriam our nanny was gone and I was the one with them, I just sort of gave up on any real "method" that she had been trying. I handled it like I handle my pets b/c I've never potty trained humans but I've potty trained a lot dogs. If Harmon drank water than I took him to the potty 20 minutes later. Otherwise every hour or so I just took him to the potty. Once he learned how to poop I used 1/4 of a Twizzler as a prize for every time he goes. When I saw he could poop and pee consistently I let him know that if he choose not to use the potty there was a negative consequence, he would lose a Thomas Train for 1 day. He is doing it! Now we will see if he can handle us being away for a couple of days and stick to it. Either way I'm teased about my "dog" training... but it worked!

In other news: It was Harm's last day of school today. We are very sad b/c we know he will miss his teachers and class mates. I'm hoping he will love his Summer Camp just as much. He will be back in August though so that will be something to look forward too. Oh and Miriam is home from Europe!!!! We missed her so much!!!!

Mom! Mum! Mommy! Momma!

I saw this clip last night for a TBS commercial. I almost died laughing. This was SOOO me yesterday. I was a little tired after not getting much sleep this weekend and so Chris was trying to let me rest a little. The kids had another idea... they sat next to me and kept wanting attention so I kicked them out and locked the door. I than had 3 kids pushing and yelling at the door "momma, mommy, MOM..." until Chris took them outside to ride bikes. After bike riding was over they all came back and guess what I could hear at the door: "mom, mommy, momma..." Oh well, when I'm older and my home is quieter than a tomb I'll probably miss these days!

My new TV guilty pleasure!

I admit shows like The Soup and Bridezillas are little guilty pleasures of mine. Yes they give me no new knowledge or sense of social responsibility but they always give me good laughs. Parking Wars is my latest pleasure! It is so flipping funny how people can be sometimes.

Little Restaurant goers...

It is funny how the way you are raised affects so much how you raise your children. I don't think Chris went to more than 5 real restaurants (sit down w/a menu) before he turned 10. He is #3 of 9 children w/a stay at home mom. He teases me that he likes barbecue so much b/c until he was in college he thought barbecue was hamburgers on the grill. On the other hand my mom worked and my family has always loved eating out. I can't remember not eating out ever at nice restaurants. If we ever acted up we knew we would be murdered so I can't remember but a handful of times ever acting up and when I have my mother made sure I got a talking too so it never lasted long.

I guess this has motivated me to teach my kids to behave well in restaurants and in general when we are in public. Well lets just say I often equate getting the kids anywhere is like herding cats. Well having them behave at a restaurant is like herding tigers into a high chair and getting them to eat lettuce.

Anyhow we are making it work. Our tricks include, lots of finger foods, bringing Harm his own sandwich b/c he hates all food practically, magnetic drawing boards, small quiet toys, and begging the waiter to beg the kitchen staff to be swift ;) Yesterday we went to a great Mexican place and the twins cracked us up. They kept dipping their chips into the salsa, guzzled water, and repeated again. They are my little Hispanic babies at heart.

Hopefully one day they will be as well behaved as my siblings and I were as kids. Of course now I understand why my parents insisted on going to places that serve alcohol. Since we don't drink that means we always need places with great desserts!

Politics: bikinis vs swim MuMu's ...

Chris and I have had to work rather closely this week. Our temporary help while our nanny Miriam is out of town fell through and so we are just trying to get it done. This experience has given me new appreciation for Chris. One of Rachel's therapists told me how Chris just really pushed her today at gym and she did things she has never done for us. Tonight he took all the kids by himself to Peter Piper and they had a great time.

I laughed tonight when I read an article about couple compatibility: link. It said if you want to find a great life partner that your best bet is to find a partner who aligns themselves politically as you do. Well, Chris and I are doomed. If I like Clinton he likes Bush. If I want universal health care he wants to dissolve medicare/medicaid. It made me think that honestly we are not very compatible about much. Heck we even argue about religion (and we are members of the same religion).

Example in point. We are going to Cancun later this year. I wanted to be a little cuter this year than normal. Since I have the chest of a 5 year old boy making cleavage impossible I thought this top would be adorable and not over the top (I was going to match it with some adorable board shorts).

You would think I was trancing around the beach in a string bikini and a thong if you had seen Chris' reaction. I think he would prefer I wore a suit like this.

Oh well I guess we will always be doomed to being incompatible but at least we love each other!

The missing boy in Maine...

On Monday I was reading news off my IPhone. I saw the above picture and the little boy in the picture looked oddly like Harmon in some ways. It broke my heart that here he was found on a remote street wrapped in a blanket, dead. I try not to read about cases like this. It makes me so sad but this time I couldn't help myself. I thought about how he had little Lightning McQueen shoes just like Harmon. How he probably loved to run and talk about fun things like trains and friends. I kept wondering how could no one know who he was? How could a beautiful child like that not matter to anyone?

Today they found out who he was. His name is Camden Pierce Hughes. (Camden was a name I considered for Harmon.) He was a really beautiful little boy!

Tonight I hugged my son a little tighter.